And let's face it...doesn't it sometimes feel like He's on vacation and not to be reached. I had a pretty crappy week this week. My son's reading ability has apparantly plummetted since last year, my husband got raked over the coals by the parent of student he taught two years ago, and we might be looking at a seriously financially tight year. Not to mention ending the week with a playdate from hell with 3 of my daughter's friends who could do nothing but fight, whine and manipulate each other for three hours...Carly being the queen of the "pains-in-the-butt". And to add insult to an injured psyche, we woke up Sunday morning to a bathroom drain clogged with hardened candle wax that Carly thought would be cool to pour out when it was a hot liquid...there goes another $200 that we don't have. Yeah...I can relate to the feeling that God is busy tending to and blessing another family somewhere else (which is how Tami placed God in Idaho. A friend of hers was sending her emails filled with praises to God for the many blessings He was pouring on her family...while Tami was feeling utterly alone)...and there are many times in my life when it felt like God wasn't available to take my call and was passing me over to tend to his other children.
Even King David and later on, Christ, using the same words, had moments of wondering where the Lord was and why wasn't he answering the phone. "My God, My God, Why have you forsaken me?" I doubt that God the Father looked upon the two of them and tisked, "...Now, now, now,...you know I will never leave you nor forsake you...you really must not be that far along in your walk if you're saying that...where's your joy?" No...He was silent in those moments. And we can discuss all the theology that explains why the Lord is silent some times. Some say it's because there's some "unconfessed sin blocking our path of communication" or that our faith isn't strong enough. There's scripture that can back that up. But more often than not, I believe, when it feels like He's not hearing you or responding to you it's because...sometimes He is just silent. Now, do I believe that He really is on vacation? Of course not. But that's how it feels. And one of the things I've learned from my sweet, real, and raw sister is that we are absolutely allowed to and Biblically encouraged to crawl into our Daddy's lap and pound on his chest. We can get mad, we can cry out, we can beg him to pay attention to us. It's the nature of His relatiohsinp with His children...the word "Israel" itself means "to wrestle with God". And it's one of the most miraculous aspects of the gospel. Through Christ's death and resurrection, He gave us the opportunity to have the intimate relationship with His Daddy that he has. And that relatiohsip...is what it's all about. It's what the Creator of the universe wants more than anything and why He sent Christ on our behalf. He longs for a real relationship with us. He knows as soon as we get in His lap and pour it all out, we can't help but see Who He is compared to who we are....and we can bring him all our junk...not hide it away in pretty little "spiritual" packages deep within our heart...but get it all out and dealt with.
The morning after Tami's "vacation" comment, we were sitting at my mom's kitchen table for breakfast. "I read the coolest thing in this devotional your mom has, written by Tozer", Tami said sleepily as she sipped her coffee. "Oh..." I responded with a big sister smirk on my face, "Then you are on speaking terms with Him." "Well...", Tami cried, "I keep reading...hoping He's gonna send me a postcard." Brilliantly put, sistah!
"All the paths of the Lord are mercy and truth to such as keep His covenant and His testimonies." Psalm 25:10.
Mercy and truth...it's what we always get from him...eventually. So keep crawling into that lap and pound away...and keep on the look out. You never know when He'll throw down a miracle, move a mountain or two...or at least...send you a postcard.
